JOIN THE MOVEMENT – ALL OUT

A picture is worth a thousand words, but a collection of pictures in motion says much more…

Take a look at this:

a collection of pictures in motion

That is All Out! Impressive huh?

In short, All Out is about Building the global movement for LGBT Community. Launched on 8^th December2010, All Out will run creative Campaigns from early 2011 to change culture­-and policy-so that LGBT people everywhere can lead lives   of dignity and share fully in the community life.

Coincidentally, this is about that time when we all sit back and evaluate our failures and achievements during the year which is a bad news, good news situation.

Its bad news because unfortunately, the year is gone nothing can be done about that; good news because we have what you can call a ‘fresh start’. A new year begins in a few days. It’s the time for making new resolutions for the New Year. And while you are out there thinking of New Year resolutions…consider this:

 "When a marginalized and scapegoated group decides to join together and demand the change they want to see in their nation and in the world, powerful social movements can arise.  That time has come for the diverse and expansive global LGBT community. All Out is giving each of us a platform to step up and speak out to make certain that this change comes sooner, not later." Julian Bond, former Chair of the NAACP.

The powerful social movements spoken about by Julian Bond needs me,you and all the friends that you and I can rally to join All Out. If there is something out there worth fighting for, worth achieving, this is it. Your right to live and love freely.

Join the movement at www.allout.org and spread the word to everyone willing to listen!

“ANYTHING WORTH HAVING IS WORTH FIGHTING FOR”

Sweetp

Furor at FIFA chief's Qatar 2022 gay sex comments

Now, why did that decision give me the shivers…

World cup 2022 in Qatar!!

Well it didn’t take too long.

The FIFA chief was in Africa again…South Africa. When I first saw this on BBC I thought that first statement was rather off…check out HERE

You have to be very keen to get the first part of the video...Mr.Chief says “Then I should say they should refrain from any sexual activity... (laugh).” That struck me as...ummh...' he didn't just say that, did he?' 

So I  made a post of it to one of the internal sites here(We keep it on the down low...this is ME after all). Pardon me for not naming the site. Anyways, I decide to go take a bath and contemplate what this means? The whole World cup in Qatar 2022 thingi; what does this mean if they do accept everybody for that one month? What if they don't? How is this going to play? Will Qatar 2022 be the key for us to the Middle East door?

Less than half an hour and I come across this from CNN

Check out

I guess it has just begun but there will be more on this am sure.

Now this is something...

Is it just me or someone opened the proverbial Pandora’s Box?

Sweetp

Educate and recruit Afican LGBT Activists

I have taken to reading the electronic media on the advances made by african activists in line with progressing the fight for LGBT rights. Since I accepted myself as who I am, I have tried to read any possible article on LGBTI issues in Africa and East Africa (Kenya in particular). I’m trying to educate myself on the progress of LGBTI issues across the world. I have had the opportunity to read stories from across the continent of Africa from the North to South; East to West. There are brilliant men and women out there risking their lives everyday for the rest of us.

Lately, I watched MP David Bahati of Uganda in an interview on the Rachel Maddow Show.  See here. David Bahati  known for the infamous Anti-Homosexual bill that has got many Ugandan gays living in fear daily was in the US to a ttend a conference (he wa not allowed into the conference..hehehe). Well, what struck me most in the interview is Mr. Bahati’s insistance that children were being recruited into “gayism” in schools. Even though he found himself hard pressed to explain the nature of recruitment involved; it all got me thinking…

Recruiting…maybe the LGBT Activism needs some recruitment. There are thousands of LGBT people of age and I mean over 18years old willing to join the ranks however with no idea of where to start.  The door should be openned for those willing to participate in the LGBTI freedom fight. We not only need to recruit but we also need to train our personnel adequately on strategy and methodology. Put our best foot forward not just any foot.

David Kuria in his article LGBTI RIGHTS IN AFRICA - DIVERSE STRATEGIES?  has highlighted a very critical issue for LGBTI in Africa. My two cents worth and please note that i am no expert in LGBTI issues and therefore this is not a critique of the article...  Althought Skill based migration may seem as a good option for most, it may end up eroding the work force that is currently the backbone of LGBT activism in Africa. Perhaps the focus should shift to educating the LGBTI community and recruiting more activists.  The LGBTI community all over the world has received increased media coverage and visibility. What we need are trained individuals to help progress the fight in the grassroots level.  If scholarships geared towards training of LGBTi individuals in key professional skills from financial to  healthcare with a requirement to serve a certain period of time in progressing the LGBTI Cause in their countries of origin; a major step forward would be made.

We may have many willing to join activism in any form; however, do they bring with them any expertise?

I for one would love to join in the fight. But the lack of knowledge on the first thing about activism let alone LGBTI activism tells me I need some sort of training. I could just join in to chants of “we want freedom now” with the best of them  but I believe there is more to the fight than this.

Do you have an idea on any such scholarships or internships? Are there any sites or groups offering such training for African LGBTI?

Well I grew up being told Education is Key…I say, just show me the door…

Sweetp.

Good Anger?

Am angry…am angy at everything…

Am angry at the society that is so bigoted, discriminative,hateful and prejudiced. Am angry at myself for being so understanding of those who don’t care to understand me. I am angry at the distance that keeps me and the one that I love from each other. And mostly am angry that even if we were at the same place at the same time, we would still be hiding what we feel about each other unless ofcourse that place happens to be an accepting one.

The good thing about this anger is that I do not feel like punching something on the face, maybe its because generally am not a violent person, but it make me want to change something. I want to change how they look at me when they realize that am a lesbian. I want to change how they feel about me being a lesbian. I want to change how they react when they find out that someone they have known for most of their lives actually aint straight.

There are so many people out there fighting for people like me to be more accepted in this society. They risk life and limb to ensure that I am treated differently by the next person I meet. To these people, I may not know you personally and may not know where you are…but I would like you to know that I am forever thankful and greatful for the work you are doing.

While I have been sitting on the sidelines watching these great men and women fight, secretly hoping that no one spots me in the arena, my self and I have agreed that the passive stance is of no consequence. I yearn to join the army. There is no satisfaction in sitting still. Even if courage eludes me, am sure one voice added to the throng will make a difference however small. Am sure courage will meet me half way. There is satisfaction in fighting for a worthy cause…and the worth of this cause is my life.

For some the struggle continues…For me, it has just begun...

Is this good anger or what?

Sweetp

This week...

As I read blogs this week, I have had so many emotions playing out in me. There are things that just plainly leave you utterly speechless. Well, this week two blogs did just that to me. The first being Gug’s GayUganda. Reading his article Sunday Afternoon…Sunday Morning, my first reaction was to bust out laughing. Incredible, just incredible.  Then anger followed...How sick can a man’s mind be to accuse people of terrorism just because they are different? Nkt.(1^st time I am using this..) Please see this link on the same story http://wthrockmorton.com/2010/11/13/ugandas-rolling-stone-blames-terrorist-attacks-on-gays/ Who is this Giles Muhame?

I wanted to know who is this dude. I just had to find out. Curiosity was killing me. The details I came across affirmed my suspicions. He is only 22 years old. Figures! For a 22year old, he sure owns everything! Still wet behind the ears; being taken advantage of by people who know better; he has become the judge and jury of Uganda’s homosexuals. Hmm…I pity him. I feel sorry for him. I would love to have a conversation with him 8years down the line.

The second article was from the blog Lez Get Real. I have been following the story of a corrective rape case in South Africa that has been online for a while. You can get the full story on this link http://lezgetreal.com/2010/11/the-shocking-truth-of-corrective-rape-survivors-speak-from-south-africa/

The fact that gang rape is something that hits too close to home is negligible (having gone through the same not so many years ago); what struck me is the strength of the women in the video. As they tell their story, I felt my chest constrict followed by a pain that I could not describe. Simply put, it cut like a knife.

I cannot understand the depth of hatred that fellow human beings can have in them to force themselves into another and hope to change that individuals mind about their sexuality. How daft can one be? When did we stoop so low? How can a group of men rape 13year old twins because they “do not want them to be lesbians like their mother” and someone think that's right? Are we that ignorant? Are we that heartless?

I think I am still enraged… yes I am. No... this is not rage...what I feel... what I feel...i cannot aptly put into words right now.hmmm...

(Breathing)

I am none to judge a fellow human being; but every bone in me says this is wrong. Dead wrong. Nothing can justify rape of any kind. Nothing can justify harming another just because you have different beliefs. Nothing justifies making others live like cages birds while you claim the sky. There is just no justification; religious or otherwise.

I believe that as LGBT people we will rise; we will rise beyond the hatred, we WILL rise beyond the inequality, we WILL rise beyond religious and political bigotry, we WILL rise beyond the intimidation; we will RISE!

Diversity: Variety is the spice of life!

Am having a terrible cold and all I can think of is my girlfriend. I know that if she was here, I would be getting VIP treatment with a little tongue lashing to go with it. I love having a lot of TLC when am feeling unwell…not the smothering kind but the am-right-here-for-you kind. To take my mind off her absence I have decided to write something for the blog. Am not sure what it is I want to write about but I guess we’ll all find out at the end.

The other day I took a trip to the doctors. I have this skin condition that only comes when the whether is changing. Now that we are approaching ‘winter’ (not that it snows here); the rushes have sprung out of hiding. I have never been bothered about them before but for some reason I think its time I found out what they are. So I talked my colleague into booking an appointment with a doctor he was seeing for his skin condition.

Well the appointment was confirmed but when I got there; I had to wait for an hour to be attended. Reason: the doctor was attending to other patients. I was in a foul mood and being kept waiting did not help much. Looking around, I was the only black skinned patient. Now I asked myself; do I really have to ask why am being kept waiting? As the nurse at the reception called the lady who had an appointment after my appointment; I felt the anger growing in me. Was I being overlooked? Should I go to the reception and ask what the hell is going on? Was I seeing preferential treatment here or am I overreacting?  I decided to sit and wait and made a mental note to take it up with the doctor which I eventually did. In a sarcastic way with a tilt of humor, I made known my thought on the appointment system and the preferential treatment I was accorded. The doctor on his part, an elderly Indian man, acknowledged and apologized on behalf of his staff. His tone was of an adult to a two year old child. Well I decided to ignore.

But one thing kept running through my mind. Was I treated different? What if they new I was a lesbian would it have been worse? When we are all human; why do we treat people differently? As depicted in George Orwell’s book Animal Farm…is it true that all animals are equal but others are more equal than others?  I look at the palm of my hands and my fingers clearly show me that we were not meant to be the same. Some short and some long but they are still fingers. If you lost a finger, wouldn’t you be somehow disabled?

It does not matter whether you are straight or gay, whether smart or stupid, whether rich or poor. We are all human beings. Variety is the spice of life…

“We all should know that diversity makes for a rich tapestry, and we must understand that all the threads of the tapestry are equal in value no matter what their color.” – Maya Angelou

It is therefore unfortunate that we are willing to ostracize, kill, maim, rape, bully or insult others just because they are different. How far are we willing to go before we realize that what makes us different is what binds us together?

Food for thought:  

“Toward no crimes have men shown themselves so cold- bloodedly cruel as in punishing differences of belief” – James Russell Lowell

Sweetp

Discovering new things?

Every time I need a change, I try out for something out of the ordinary. When I was younger, I went for a haircut good enough to complement my tomboyish look. Sometimes I tried out changing my wardrobe into some few things more feminine. Recently, I moved to dreadlocks. I have thought of having them since I was sixteen but at the time thoughts of my mother’s wrath dispelled all hopes. Most people would say there is nothing wrong with having dreadlock, and I know that. But, if you had you fingers nearly chopped off for wearing a ring, you’d know not to mess with my mother. It would be good to know that she has mellowed down with age though.

I chose dreadlocks purely because it would not only symbolize a new beginning but because I thought I would look good. More like killing two birds with one stone. It is also a constant reminder of what I missed out when in my teen and early twenties. I am a late bloomer in many ways. My little journey to self acceptance begun in 2009; in this short time, I have learnt so much that I did not know before. The major discovery was that there are people out there who are like me and are actually known to be who they are. Wow, now that was a shocker. Then discovering movies and books…which planet have I been living in? Then came the big question, is this even acceptable? Am a Christian, how can I relate this to my faith?

Could I risk taking a long hard look at the mirror and trying to come into terms with the view that will be looking right back at me?

I asked myself hard questions that I had never thought to explore before. Why was I born a woman and not a man? Why am I black and not white? Why am I relatively tall and not a midget? Why? Why? Why? Do I even like me? If you asked me who I am, would I able to summarize it all in one word?

As much I would love to say that I came out with something concrete in terms of answers; I will disappoint you. Not a thing. Not one answer or even a clue. Instead I began to appreciate all the little things that make me who I am. I found out that I am a lot of thing that not one word can describe. I am a daughter, a sister, an aunty, a friend, a lover, a colleague, a neighbor, an advisor, a mentor, a cousin etc. I hold a host of roles that one word can not describe who I am. 

I am also a lesbian but ultimately I am a human being.

I love who I am.

Sweetp.

Am Glad I Failed

I came, I saw and I conquered…in my own minuscule way.

Lately there has been a lot of blogs on gay teen suicides in America. Am not sure whether there are statistics of these in Africa; if there is, please do share. http://www.soulforce.org/article/653

My babe has this theory about how the brain works. She says, when you think of one thing, your brain does an auto search just like Google and gives you all the alternative topics related to the subject. There will always be one alternative that stands out as most relevant and you will find your thoughts drifting to the strongest suggested topic. So, after reading so many blogs on suicides; my brain set itself to work and brought me closer home. I can relate to the stories in many ways but the end.

I remember being sent back home from school for the second time. This time, I didn’t know how I would face my parents. I was seventeen; quiet and shy in an outgoing way (am not sure if there’s anything like shy in an outgoing way). Let’s just say, I was outspoken, mostly to cover my shyness. I considered this a defense mechanism to keep prying people away. Anyways, I digress. Well, back to the story…I was home on a suspension from high school. This was the second time. A repeat offender, which makes my case very hard to defend to anyone even those that are considered objective.

How would I face my mom (She was the disciplinarian for the family)? What would I say to make her believe am innocent? If I was in her shoes, I would not believe me either.

The longest hours I have ever faced were those five hours between the time I reached home and the time my mom was expected to come home from work. I tried to come up with all sorts of explanations in my head; while managing to look nonchalant about the whole issue in front of my fellow felons who had decided to pass time at my place while they procrastinated facing their own parents.

My mom did come home from work, and let’s just say it went well. She didn’t believe me, but she did not strangle me to death either; which is a good thing. What transpired after that was some sort of cold war. Neither of my parents was talking to me.  I suddenly became the pariah at home. Things were happening around me like I did not exist. We are a big family, but I was the only one with my own room, my 6 siblings shared two rooms (Just incase you are wondering, am not the only girl in my family).

The first few weeks were the toughest…no…the week after the parent-teacher panel was the toughest. It was now clear that what was a suspension was now definitely an expulsion. The gravity of my crime was now +10 in my parent’s eyes. The silence mode intensified and I had a lot of time in my hands and a very idle mind with it. I was on my own, to do as I saw fit and my first though was to end my life. They did not deserve the pain and shame that I was putting them through.

I went to the nearest shop and bought enough Malaraquin dosage that could treat a whole household (…this I had been told was the most common way to go other than rat n rat). On the first day, I went downstairs to the kitchen…got a bottle of water and back up to my room…lined 16 white tablets on the dressing mirror, looked at myself with tear filled eyes, then back at the tablets for an hour…just seated their…with a pen and paper ready to write my last words to those that I love and had disappointed tremendously. But the thought of how bitter one pill is made me postponed my plan to the next day. I told myself, I will go buy some juice so that it won’t be that bitter. I did buy juice; went though the same routine again, lining up all my requirements on the dressing mirror and this time; my kid brother came home early from school and knocked on my door…he wanted to tell me how his day had gone…I took my stuff and hid them in the drawer. Tomorrow is another day, I thought…

This went on for a while, and I guess maybe I was a lot chicken to take my own life or maybe there is a greater power that thought my time was not yet here and sent all the interruptions; I do not know. All I do know is that; I made it through and now when I seat back and talk to my babe about it (she is the only person I have shared that part of my life with), I think it couldn’t have been that bad. But at that age, it was.

My reaction thereafter was to pretend none of that ever took place. I decided to shut it out; block that experience out of my life. I barely can remember much of what happened in between but am glad that now I have someone that I can share what I can remember with. She sometimes gets to fill in the blanks for me and am forever grateful for that.

Am sure there are so many of us out there who have gone and are going through this and there will be others who will go through the same thing.

For those who are going through the same thing, just remember one thing:

If it doesn’t break you, it only makes you stronger.

Dying may be a Solution but it is not THE SOLUTION.

Talk to somebody…sees below URL for a starting point:

http://galck.org/index.php?option=com_content&view=frontpage&Itemid=2

I am no expert but your can mail me at sweetppillows@gmail.com

Sweetp

Gay Rights Kenya - The Murugi Saga

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5XCbZpIGBPw

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bK-cIjEJVU8

I must say, I have not set eyes on the “controversial” statement issued by Esther Murugi, so I cannot comment on the intended message thereof but the combination of permutations on its meaning has been mind boggling to say the least. If you have a copy please paste the link.

Before I go any further; thank you Honorable Minister for your boldness.

She must have known what would come out of this well before she made the statement. I bet she had looked at all alternative options on how best to frame that particular paragraph so that it may not be misconstrued. Whether she is misunderstood or that was exactly what she meant to say is another matter.

Well…that’s politics.

As I keep on saying, what you say shall eventually be used against you. Saying she did though, and this has set a new stage for the LGBTI community.

The unspoken has been spoken. A new trend has been set and history has been written. If she is remembered for nothing else, then am sure the LGBTI community in Kenya shall remember her for this. Personally, I will be forever grateful to Hon. Esther Murugi for setting the stage. If you believe in omens, then this surely is one.

Publicity is Publicity at the end of the day. Whether negative or positive, it can work for or against. In my opinion, the stage has been set, the ball is rolling, lets keep the momentum…we are so far away from the final whistle…but when the whistle blows, let the LGBTI community emerge victorious.

What Kenyans MUST know; LGBTI people exist, have always existed and will continue to exist.

The winds of change on LGBTI issues are being experience all over the world and Kenya is no exception.

The struggle continues

Sweetp.

20 School Girls Arrested in Zim

Twenty Schoolgirls Arrested in Zimbabwe Homosexuality Crackdown.

That was the headline chosen by Adam Amir for his article in change.org. It is catchy and sensational too.

Checkout: http://gayrights.change.org/blog/view/twenty_schoolgirls_arrested_in_zimbabwe_homosexuality_crackdown

“While Americans celebrate a major victory in the battle for LGBT rights, news from Zimbabwe shows how much work still has to be done. According to the ZimDiaspora.com, police in Bulawayo, Zimbabwe's second-largest city, have arrested some 20 schoolgirls for allegedly engaging in "lesbian relationships.”
The girls played soccer for their all-girl high school, Eveline High School. One of their teammates reported the alleged lesbian relationships to Eveline administrators.
Locals appeared largely unsympathetic in the press. The soccer club president, Theresa Ndlovu, felt "disappointed," rather than what I would expect would be outrage for the jailing of such young girls.
Likewise, locals like the Bulawayo province education minister Dan Moyo seemed to agree. He said in a ZimDiaspora.com interview, “I only read about it in the papers, and I was shocked. I do not expect such behavior. It is unacceptable.”
Despite such a harsh reaction, officials could not confirm whether the accusations were truthful. "We’re not sure if the accusations are true or a result of feuds among the pupils," Moyo said.”

Psssst

Ignorance is no defence... A little info goes a long way...

You can find a copy at GALCK

If you land in trouble, and you are in Kenya, protect yourself with this and just incase, keep the lawyer numbers in your phone...you never know when it will come in handy.


"sharing is caring?"

Sweetp.

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The road i choose to travel

For years I have kept my thought to myself. I learnt at an early age that what you say can and shall be used against you. A secret is no longer a secret when there is a second party involved unless of course the second party is your maker. Even then, one is weighed down with thoughts of judgement day when all things shall be brought to light. At 17, I chose this path; to keep my thoughts and feelings however heavily the weighed on me.

Now I chose travel a different road.

The road of self discovery, rediscovering what I had lost at 17 when in my naivety, I blurted out to my mother that I thought I am a lesbian. Leave alone the slap that crossed my face in the split of a second (thank God it was only a slap); the subsequent events are what led me to my decision. It was the second time I was being suspended from school for allegedly liking girls. My problem was not with liking girls; I never understood how they knew that I liked girls as I had never acted on it. So I decided to keep away from all and sundry. There must have been something sticking out in me like a sore thumb. Maybe it was written on my forehead in a way only others could see but not me.

Now am on a new road…

The road that few choose to travel and most would rather not. I choose to join the fight and not just let others fight for me. There must be something that I was born to do…I must have a purpose on this earth however tiny it may be. Lately, my life has been shaped a lot through the blogs and various articles that I have read from people who have had the courage to share their thoughts and experiences with the rest of us.

Am hoping that through this blog, I will be able to make the tiniest of a difference; I will share my experiences and learn from yours. That someone will get in this forum what I had longed to have at 17 and the years after…understanding, empathy, compassion, commonality, community or even just the sense of knowing someone out there is going through or has gone through what I am going through.

It may be a road less travelled…but am sure you know what they say about that already!

“…whatever is good, think of such things…”

Sweetp